Hey Sir and Mim!

Hi Sir and Mim! This is Eli! I wanted to tell you Happy Valentine's Day. I also wanted you to see my new scooter. Oh, and Sam wanted you to see his crazy hair. Everytime he wakes up from nighttime or naptime, it looks like that! Funny, huh? See you soon! Gotta go watch American Idol now.

2008 Winners

I did it! I picked my favorite photos of 2008! Last February, when I took a photography class, I had no idea I would enjoy it so much! It is amazing that I learned anything, since most classes were spent in a daze, mourning my sister. God graciously allowed me the avenue of photography to express myself last year. Most of these photos were taken with my old non-dslr camera and without any help from Photoshop. I am excited to see what I am capable of learning this year...with the help of a nicer camera, photoshop, and an external flash (hopefully coming soon!) If you allowed me to take your pictures in 2008, then I thank you from the bottom of my heart! It was very therapeutic for me and I promise you I had the time of my life! Thanks!
PS--I am dying to know what your favorite one is!!

Nostalgia

For the sake of remembering...

Bone Tired

I am bone tired weary. I have felt like my eyes could shut at any moment today and not open again for 10 hours. I am hitting the pillow very early tonight. I am emotionally and physically spent.

I had two awful dreams last week. In the first one, my dearest Mommy died. Enough said. I was going around screaming, "It's just too much, it is too much!" I just know the emotions in that dream were even beyond what I have felt with Kiley gone. I called her the next day to tell her she wasn't allowed to die...ever. (The only way I can see this to fruition is if Jesus comes to snatch us all away!) Death is such a nasty thing. No wonder the Word says we just can't understand it.

In the second dream, I found Kiley and she was alive. Alive, like on earth alive, not in heaven alive. She had faked her death and was hiding from us. She refused to go home with me to our family. I wanted to rip her hair out and tell her the grief she had caused. Finally, she broke down and told me that she had been threatened to leave and never return...and that if she returned, our family would be in danger.

Dreams are so vivid and so real and so haunting sometimes. I guess those dreams will remain with me forever. The good news is that Kiley is alive. The bad news is that my dreams will be haunted with her image until my eyes get to look upon hers once again. And that "once again" will be the start of forever again.

For the Love of the Game

Yay!

This movie is awesome! I love it! Yah for people who make movies about marriage and Christ and all things good!

Seashells and Cheerful Hearts

When we were in Texas on the "beach", Eli found several shells. He carried those around the whole vacation and managed to sweet talk his way into bringing them all home with him. Yesterday, he decided to give them all a bath. After about 30 minutes of carefully washing each one, he had himself some shiny opalescent shells! He was so proud of them!

This morning, he caught me off guard. He reached for the brightest, largest shell and proceeded to tell me that he was going to give it to his teacher. I had to hold my tongue. I wanted to tell him that these shells were precious to him and that he might want to keep the largest most beautiful one for himself. They were his "treasure", after all!

I quickly silenced myself as Eli proceeded to wrap it carefully and put it into his backpack. Shame on me for not teaching him to give his best and most precious things away. Isn't that what God Almighty did for us when He sent His only Son to die on the cross for our redemption and restoration? How humbling that I had to learn yet something else from a child.

I love to give to others, but I can assure you that it isn't always my most prized possessions. God loves a cheerful giver...what would it look like if I gave away my special things in order to receive joy? It makes me wonder how materialized I really am.

When Eli got home from school, I asked him what his teacher thought about the shell. He said she liked it. ("What?? That's it? Doesn't she know that was your largest and most beautiful shell and that you gave it without reserve or expecting anything in return?") I wonder if God looks into our hearts and minds and wonders the same thing. ("What?? That's it? I sent my one and only Son to die a horrific death for you and I get a muttered thanks in return?)

Lord, give us grateful hearts for your Gift and unreservedly giving hearts toward others.

How Gross.

God has such a sense of humor! Even the "mating calls" so to speak are downright hilarious. I took this pic last year on one of Cade's field trips. Yesterday, as I was reading an animal planet book to Eli, it gave this fact about the camel:

"When a male camel is interested in a female, it will hang a large, pink, inflated, bladderlike glob out if its mouth called a dulla. It looks as if the camel has a fleshy, pink water balloon hanging from its jaws. And evidently, the girls think it's attractive. Go figure."

Hmmm, I don't know if camels have 4 stomachs like cows and have to regurgitate their stuff in order to aid in the digestion process, or not, so I am not sure if the pic above is an attempt to digest its food or an attempt to pick up Mrs. Camelah, but, well, kinda makes you wonder, huh?

Speech Meet

Cade's Speech Meet was today. I think it is wonderful that they start this out on the youngsters; it give kids the opportunity to memorize passages and conquer their fears while speaking in front of others. I had huge tears pool up twice. The first time was when a sweet little girl starting getting teary eyed before she even stood up. Once she was in front of everyone, the tears started gushing. Through choked sobs, she recited her perfectly memorized poem. I wanted to whisk her away and shower her with Motherly kisses, but I refrained. It is harder for some personalities to speak in front of crowds which is why I started crying for her. I hate speaking in front of crowds and I'm not real sure I enjoy speaking amongst small groups! So, my first tears were of empathy for this little girl!

My second tears came when the final contestant (my first born son) stood up and retold the fable "The Boy Who Cried Wolf." How can such pride emanate from the recitation of a small speech? Besides the fact that he had it memorized, his speed and volume were perfect.

It makes me wonder how the next two guys in line will handle these sort of things. Eli will probably soak up the attention and Sam probably won't care one iota about what the crowd thinks! It is so fun to see how God creates everyone differently, each with unique talents and ways to express themselves.

Happy Birthday to my only Niece!

Happy 3rd to my only niece, Tia!! Do you know what a miracle you are...being the only Stuart girl in like 100 years! I would say you are blessed and highly favored! May God protect, guide, and bless you. I pray you will be redeemed at an early age and be given a heart that longs to know and love Jesus. I love you! Aunt Becke'