It's the Last Day of the Year and I Better Have All My Ducks In a Row.

I guess these are geese, not ducks.  But, they kind of look like they are lined up in a row and ready to go.  Ready for 2011 and whatever gets thrown at them.  I bet they are hoping for a chunk of bread instead of a crumb buried under the snow.  Cause that would be soooo 2010.  And they are ready for joy.  To the max.

Oh, wait, that is me.

Most 31st of Decembers, I find myself with a notebook and a list of resolutions that are set in stone and ready to roll out starting at 6 am the next morning.  And then my eyelids see the clock for the first time at 8 am the next morning and the resolutions have at once failed.

So, this year:  no resolutions.  Not to say I don't need some change in my life (buying the Zumba wii game will hopefully help me shake off my rear if I didn't run it off in 2010) but I am not going to write a ton of stuff down only to fail miserably in approximately 6 weeks.  Or a day.  You know, depending on what the resolution was.  Like getting up early.  Yep, that one requires grace.  Lots of grace.

So, this year, I feel like God has given me a passage of scripture that is the prayer of my heart and I am going to (gulp) memorize it.  I prayed if He would give me the brains to memorize then I would at least attempt it.  I think we'll be a good team, God and I.

Here it is.  Play by play.  Cause that is how I am gonna role with this passage.  Each verse is meaningful, so I am gonna unpack it which in turn, will help me remember it.  God is genius.  Definitely good to have him on my side.

Psalm 90:12-17

12:  So teach us to number our days that we might get a heart of wisdom.
{Lord help me to make the most of each day...to surrender to your plans each day even if they interrupt my own plans. Give me the right priorities for each day and keep me from looking like the world.}

13:  Return, O LORD!  How long?  Have pity on your servants!
{I want your presence on a daily and very tangible level.}

14:  Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days.
{Help me recognize your love that is at work in my life...a joyful heart will result!}

15:  Make us glad for as many days as you have afflicted us, and for as many years as we have seen evil.
{I am ready for restoration and joy as opposed to threshing and refinement.}

16:  Let your work be shown to your servants, and your glorious power to their children.
{The ESV study notes say:  Display your love toward your people in great deeds of power that enable them to flourish.  I like that quite a bit.}

17:  Let the favor of the Lord our God be upon us, and establish the work of our hands upon us; yes, establish the work of our hands!
{The Hebrew word for favor is "no'am" which means beauty.  May God's own beauty be on display through me!!!}

Eric and I have totally surrendered his work/job/future career and our family to God and His plans.  Even if it means moving.  We would love to stay here, but we need to be wherever it is that God is going to establish the work of our hands!  We're praying for discernment and a huge undeserved blessing of restoration.

We don't have a clue what 2011 holds for us, but we look forward to seeing God display His love towards us in great deeds of power that will enable us to flourish.

As far as looking back over some of what God was up to in 2010, I keep going back to one post.  It was back in January and it changed the way I prayed over the year.  I started claiming that I knew that God could turn a completely dire situation into one of abundance in the span of only 24 hours.  I started asking for help with my unbelief.  I wonder if I have any practical excuses today that are getting in the way of God's blessings.

If I could only go back and reread one post from last year, I think it would be this one.  Because unbelief is serious business and because it seems to be a daily battle.

My biggest praise this year is to God for keeping Kirby alive during his wreck.  Sweet of God to give me that gift on Christmas day!

So, I guess I have all my spiritual ducks for 2011 all lined up in a row now.

Which means God is going to shake my world!

2010 Fave Family Pics

WOW...as I have gone back thru our family pics this year, I have realized one thing:  I haven't taken as many pics as usual!  I think I have been so busy taking pictures for other families that I have neglected our own a little bit.  Unfortunately, I have become a bit of a perfectionist and think twice about taking a shot of an event because I know it means editing time as well.  So, for 2011 I resolve to simply take family shots for the fun of it.  After all, the most spontaneous events and pics seem to be my faves! 

This first pic was celebrating my birthday on the beach.  Is there any better way to party it up?

 Some of my favorite pics of the boys are when they are totally being themselves. 

 I love this shot because it proves the boys aren't too old to play with stuffed animals. 

 The bright orange and crazily thin legs on this goose makes me smile.

 Boys at play...we all see who rules the roost around here.

 Probably my fave 2010 family pic...love the innocent baby cheeks, the precious lips and the bright colors.  Not your most conventional shot...but one that will always remind me of summer and childhood.  It will be one I look at 10 years from now and ache for what used to be!

 Capturing the boys loving on each other instead of wrestling! 

 The eagle might be my favorite animal shot...love the bright yellow beak against the white feathers.  Also love the determination in his eyes despite the fact that he is living in captivity.

 Not a typical eat-your-watermelon-shot.  I love the dirty toes on the bright red fruit.  I love the fact that only my youngest would think to even do this.  {and then go ahead and eat the watermelon..}

 Capturing little critters in the front yard when they decide to make a surprise appearance.

 Wasn't planning on this shot...was happy to see the fountains turned off!

 Staging a shot that means something to my heart.

 This piano was my great grandmother's...

 The song that has always been my favorite and one that my soul seems to have to come to grips with time and time again.

So, here are my goals for 2011 concerning family and photos:

1.  Take my camera with me...the best shots aren't planned

2.  Take pictures when I take my camera with me

3.  Don't shoot for perfectionism...just shoot to capture a memory

Kirby Surgery Update (Thurs. afternoon)

Kirby got out of surgery on wrist, now is in recovery.
The doctor replaced the 2 pins with different ones.  He left the rod in, which may or may not come out at a later date.

• Pray for healing and full restoration.

Christmas Pics

Kirby just headed back for his second wrist surgery about 30 minutes ago...I'll keep ya posted.

Here are a few pics of our Christmas...

 Eli is looking for the "pickle" ornament...he was the winner this year!

 Only God knew how much we were going to need this word over the next few days!

 Amelia and Scott

Wednesday Night Update on the Kirbmeister.

• Kirby got to enjoy some better food today...chick-fil-a and some fruit!
• Dad went and saw his truck and retrieved what wasn't totally damaged.  His Bible was about the only thing that was in tact and dry...amazing.  His carharts and Christmas presents are all wet and damaged, but the leather on the cover of the Bible was dry.  It was found on the driver's side of the truck.  The grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of our God stands forever.  Isaiah 40:18  Every word of God proves true, He is a shield to those who take refuge in Him.  Proverbs 30:5
• Kirby was headed to wrist surgery today but the nurse was deficient in giving him all his blood beforehand, so it is postponed to tomorrow mid day.  Pray for this surgery that will take place Thurs. at some point.
• He is having horrible headaches...pray it is due to the anemia and not something worse...another cat scan will be in order if things don't improve.
• Pray for a very attentive, competent and loving nurse for tomorrow and the rest of his stay in the hospital
• Pray that he gets some hygiene care...they don't seem to be concerned with the fact that his sweat and blood oozing from the wound doesn't really smell all that great.
• Pray Kirby is able to rest well tonight.
• Pray we might not miss God's purpose or glory in all of this...even though we are all fully aware that God doesn't always disclose what he is doing.

Why He's Booterboy.

He was two or three and the cutest thing you have ever laid your eyes on.  His gorgeous blond hair and great big dimples didn't help matters in making sure that he would always be my favorite little brother.  (Well, only little brother, but he likes to hear from time to time that he is the favorite.)

And then came the Superman Pajamas.  They marked him in a way that became irreversible.  Imagine a little fella with a great big red cape on.  The next thing you know, he is tearing through the house as fast as possible (so that his cape can get maximum air) and yelling "Booo-ter-boy...here to save the day!"

Obviously, boo-terboy was his was of saying superboy (he was too smart to think he was a man at that age I suppose.)  And, as chance would have it, he would soon be stuck with that nickname.  For life.

So as you are praying for Kirby, you can also interchange the name Booterboy. 

I am sure he won't mind a bit.

{snicker.}

I guess Kirby has always had a heart for saving the day.  But along the way, he has become convinced that only Jesus can truly save.  He has taken on a role similar to John the Baptist...preparing the way in youth's lives so that they might know God.  He helps get their feet on the path so that they might meet and truly know the real superhero.

I'll post more specifics later tonight.  Your prayers are being felt and answered!  We can't thank you enough.

Tuesday Night Update/Kirby

 The above is Kirby and his girlfriend, Jennifer.  The below is me, Kirb, and Amelia.

Thank you for your prayers...I am clinging to James 5:15 "And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up." 

Here is an update:
1.  Kirby's pain is at a 7-8 out of 10.  He is scared to death to get too much morphine again but I can't stand for him to be in pain!  So continued prayer on the right levels of medicine.

2.  His color was better today.  He has been able to eat and hold his food.

3.  He has been vacillating between hot and cold flashes with headaches.  They discovered he is anemic and he will receive some blood at some point.

4.  He is very alert and knows what day it is...even when the nurses are wrong!

5.  He was able to get up in a chair today for about an hour and a half.

6.  The doctor who repaired his wrist looked at the wrist xrays today and decided that another surgery will be in order...either for Wed. afternoon or Thursday.  He will need to do some ligament repair.  Pray for this surgery and that Kirby will have complete restoration and use of his wrist again.

7.  He will go directly to Healthsouth rehab when he is released from the hospital (not sure when this will be...)

8.  Pray for Kirby's mental state...that he wouldn't get depressed or discouraged about what all lies ahead.

9.  Pray against pneumonia or blood clots.

10.  Pray God would replenish our languishing souls and would continue to bring good news.

Monday Night Kirby Update

Hey...I know some of you are coming here for updates and specific ways to pray...so here goes:

Kirby has had a rough time with morphine and trying to figure out the right dosage to keep the pain down and yet keep his oxygen levels high enough that he doesn't become unresponsive.  There was a huge scare Sunday afternoon.  Today, they had him up moving a little bit.  Afterwards, he fell into a deep sleep and became hard to wake up.  His oxygen levels dropped so low that they administered some sort of adrenaline drug that also wipes out the previous morphine.  This, of course, brought him to alertness, but also brought back all the pain.  He was put on an oxygen mask.  As of right now (9:40 pm) he is staying in his regular room and not returning to ICU.  He has also not been able to hold down food since Sunday night.

I'm wiped out...but here are the specifics that are coming to mind on how to pray...
1.  Continued life
2.  Doctors and nurses would be filled with wisdom on how much/how often to give morphine so that it helps and doesn't hinder
3.  He would rest tonight (but not become unresponsive)
4.  The pain would start to become manageable...God would do a gracious healing of his leg, eye, and wrist
5.  His shoulder (on the same side as broken wrist and leg) would not come out of socket as it is prone to do (since he will soon be needing to use more upper body strength)
6.  The details of therapy/insurance/next steps would all work themselves out
7.  Discernment with Mom, Dad, or Jennifer (his girlfriend) as they are in the room with him...if they feel something is not right...they would act on that feeling and seek help
8.  Nausea would go away and he would be able to hold down food again
9.  God would be glorified
10.  Peace would reign in our minds and hearts and minute by minute strength for our bodies

thanks.  :)

Update on Kirby/Christmas 2010

Everything was ready to go...wassail, breakfast casserole, homemade cinnamon rolls, presents under the tree.  My Mom had done a beautiful job of creating the perfect Christmas morning.

And then we got a call.

These calls set us off.  Sometimes we even shudder when the phone rings.

We heard the word life threatening and everyone about lost control.  It didn't matter that they had said it wasn't life threatening.  To us, a call from the police simply means that nothing will ever be the same again. 

All bodily functions start to shut down.

Kirby (my 26 year old brother) had been travelling from Harrison to Springdale, hit some ice on a bridge, and flipped his truck a few times.

Breathe, Becke', just breathe.

We locked up the house and our dreams for a perfect Christmas morning and headed to the ER to spend the rest of the day.  It was eerily quiet there.  You could have heard our hearts pounding through our chests if it weren't for the aquarium tank meant to provide some color and life to the dreadful scene.

Surely God won't take my brother, too.  Surely He will spare Mom and Dad this.  Surely.

Surgery on a shattered femur bone, a broken wrist and a ghastly flesh wound in the eyebrow area started at one.  It lasted for three and a half hours.

All I could think of was "Kirby is alive. Alive. We can deal with anything as long as he is alive."

He was moved to ICU.  We had no choice but to go home.  The boys opened their Christmas presents.

Surreal.  This is all too surreal.

As they were trying to move him to a different room today, he somehow got overdosed on morphine.  Mom called to say they almost lost him.

Surely God won't take my brother, too.  Surely He will spare Mom and Dad this.  Surely.

And yet the past three years have taught me that there are no surelys.  It doesn't lessen God's sovereignty or goodness, but nothing is for sure...

So Kirby is trying to rest with shattered bones as we try to rest in God and His perfect plan.

We are so thankful that as of today, that plan means life.

We'll take life any ol' day.

Merry Christmas!

from our family to yours

may your worship be pure

and your hearts full of joy

as you celebrate

the Peace that was born in a manger

For Your Christmas Enjoyment...

...I present you:  Joseph

Big, Juicy, Colorful Fruit

I am trying to reevaluate over here.  The boys (all 5 including friends) are playing in the backyard with a broken bat.  (note to self:  add that to the Christmas list)  I have been snuggled in my oversized chair with some heavily creamed coffee and the good Book. 

It happens every year...we tend to cycle through desiring God's best.  We look at what we spend our time on.  We listen to God to see what He wants crossed off and what He wants to write down.

I thought of our community group Christmas party.  Beautiful presents wrapped in blingy paper and colorful ribbons.  Only to contain human skull piggy banks, moth balls, deer poop and seven year old abandoned wedding gifts.

A good laugh, but a let down after the deceiving wrapping.

Jesus came without any adornment.  His glory was enough for even a manger that day in Bethlehem.  The gift of Himself didn't need to be wrapped up in a pretty package.

And then there are the gifts inside each of us.  The ones given at the moment of redemption.  The Christmas card tag might say, "To:  You, my beloved...From:  the Holy Spirit...For the Purpose of:  Bringing glory to the Son of God."

Do we recognize those gifts?  Do we bury them?  Do we exploit them for our own advancement and glory?
Does the body of Christ suffer because we don't understand the gifts nor use them for the help of others?

I want more simplicity in life.  I think some things may have to be let go of so that the areas where I am gifted can be rendered effective instead of sucked up dry by all the other areas that are competing for my attention.

I don't yet know what that looks like.  But I do know that I don't have to be faithful with what hasn't been given or entrusted to me.  I can step away from those things.  But I need discernment on what those things are.

In what areas of service do you produce the biggest, juiciest, most colorful fruit?  You are beyond rich in this area because it is the Holy Spirit within you producing that fruit.  There is no room for boasting.  Or timidity.  It is probable that these areas fill you with energy and joy instead of draining you and leaving you exhausted.

Beth Moore says that we can bring our gifts to light...we can know what they are by one simple prayer:

"Give me a love for the body of Christ."

spent the day...

...capturing a couple in love.  God was so faithful...from the weather to all the small details.  

Christmas Program

When I was younger, I was in countless Christmas programs.  As a little girl, I possessed the ability to memorize huge parts and therefore, managed to have some sort of role in each of the cantatas/musicals/plays.  (Now it is torture to even memorize a single line of scripture or get in front of others for that matter...go figure.)  My Mom was usually the director and I thank her for always giving me that experience.  I can't get this one musical out of my head...it had something to do with my stuffed lamb.  (I think I was about 7 and I'll have to get better details!)

Since our church doesn't really provide a children's Christmas musical type of event, it brings my heart joy to have the boys experience this type of thing at their school.  Something about kids dressed in their Sunday best ranging from the age of 3 to 11 singing their hearts out to Jesus makes my soul swoon with giddiness.  It is just irresistibly priceless.  I bet Jesus thinks so, too.

 See that sweet blond standing by Cade?  Well, as a Mom, she is the only kid in his class that I didn't know and so on the way home, I asked him who she was.  Then I asked what her personality was like, because she seemed to have the sweetest most gentle spirit.  He described her in similar terms.  Score gift of discernment for Mommy. 

Eric started laughing out loud and saying..."so it begins!"  Now, I am in no WAY ready for my baby to be interested in anything other than his brothers and football.

But, when you see a pretty little sweet thing standing by your son, it is good to tuck this information back for a later day.  Like 15 years later.  kidding.  not.

 This pic of the second graders makes me laugh.  Eli looks like he is about to say "ahoy matey" and his buddy looks like he is about to deck someone out.  Love it.

The acting part of the program was really quite funny.  The three wisemen were basically Brad Paisley, Elvis, and P-Diddy.  The accents and things they said made the show!