Cure for the Heavy Laden

I've been pondering the concept of peace for awhile.  Certain things have snuck in to steal the stability and rest that I so crave.  It isn't just within my own life; I don't have to look far to find friends or family that are heavy laden and waiting on a little rest.

There is a new song by Tenth Avenue North called Worn that seems perfect in times like these.

Are you feeling overburdened?  There is hope for us yet.

Sometimes, I feel like the Bible can offer magical words that seem surface driven.  We love to memorize and cling to them...but do we understand them enough to recognize why they are so important?

I have felt this way with Matthew 11: 28-30 for some time.  Sure, it all sounds promising, but what does the HOW look like in my own personal life?

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

Sounds delicious, but what does it mean?

I think possibly, there are three levels of application here.  First, and most importantly, Jesus is saying that we don't have to be slaves to trying to become righteous.  Our most amazing efforts are filthy.  All we have to do is accept his sacrifice and we are covered.  We trade in our efforts and sin for his yoke of salvation.  It is a parable for salvation.  There is eternal rest available to all who are redeemed by the blood of Jesus.

Second, I think the story points to the time and era.  The Jews were under horrible religious and political persecution.  Ironically, the Jewish people had been shackled by their own religious leaders, the Pharisees.  They were under the crushing weight of all the extra and made up rules that the Pharisees said they had to live under.  The Jews were carrying the burden of trying to earn salvation by good works and they knew it was simply impossible.  Their souls were in anguish.  The had no rest and didn't see how it was possible at all.  Jesus made it easy:  accept my salvation and become my disciple...and you will have rest.

Third, I wonder what it means for us today, for Believers who are trying hard in this world to find peace amidst crushed dreams, desires not realized, blatant worldly sin, epidemic viruses, financial setbacks, and the beginnings of oppression from government.  The yoke is too heavy. 

Come unto me.  Jesus says the first thing is to come.  He isn't exclusive.  He invites all.  But, it is a command...and it means to come now, at once.

He immediately gives rest to those who are overburdened or heavy laden.  We obey by coming.  He in turn, fills us with rest (anapauo:  refresh, take ease, rest.) The "rest" is complete because Christ is offering it.

Still, the passage continues and insinuates that it doesn't stop there.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart.  I think this is where we refuse to get to, therefore our initial rest doesn't last very long.  Jesus tells us to throw off our yoke but to put on his.  That doesn't make sense, does it?  Why would we need another yoke?  And what exactly does it mean to learn from Him?

This is key!  Jesus is gentle (meek) and lowly in character...here are examples:

*He seeks the good of others
*He denies self
*He never expects to be treated well
*He doesn't aim at being honored
*He is always saying "not my will but thine" to His Father
*He doesn't strive or cry out, wanting his voice or opinion to be heard

We are to learn from Him and His character.  We are to put on this character.  His character must become my own in order for lasting peace to occur.  This requires learning His character and unlearning our own.  It is a spiritual classroom.  Whatever is burdening us is to be brought to Jesus, where we ask to see things with his meekness and humility, then rest becomes ours.

I think "rest" is mentioned twice because first, we cast off the burden and can receive rest.  But, second, we can learn and find rest In Christ. Rest from something, and then a learned rest in Someone.

Spurgeon says it well, "The rest which we are to find is a rest which grows entirely out of our spirits being conformed to the spirit of Christ."  In other words, rest is a process of sanctification.  We grow in grace, become more like Christ, and experience more rest despite the circumstances because we are thinking and acting like Jesus Himself.  We have learned to.

Here is an example of how in my own life, this can be applied.  We are in a small three bedroom house that we have loved and been so thankful for...but, we are simply out of room.  The past ten years here have been a constant decluttering, trying to find space and room for three growing boys. 

Our house is on the market, but with no lookers.  We know it is time to move, because Eric feels right about it and because there is simply no where for little Asher to go.  Now, if you have ever had a baby, you know the internal motherly instincts that creep up around the 6 month mark.  Your baby must have a place to go!!!  You want to set up the crib, changing table and rocker/glider, start collecting necessary items (hello, diapers!) and simply go into the room to daydream about your newest blessing.

Right now, Asher's space consists of 5 square inches in my closet that house his diaper bag.  He doesn't have bedding, a set up nursery, or a single diaper.  I am pretty sure that he could care less, but his Momma is about to have a conniption.

Now, I can go to Jesus anytime I want and receive some rest.  God promises that.  But, I also know there is something deeper.  In order for me to receive some lasting rest, I need to take on the character of Christ in this situation.  I need to take on humility and meekness and ask to see things from the point of Jesus.

You know what He showed me?  He showed me that He was the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, and yet he was humble enough to not just come in human form, but to be birthed in a dirty barn amidst manure and hay.  His bed was a feeding trough, covered in leftover grain and livestock slobber.

I can learn from that.  It is humiliating, for sure, but that is something I can take from the One who is lowly and meek.  I can apply that situation that I learned from Him and remind myself of it every time anxiety threatens to overturn the peace He gave.  When I feel overburdened by not having a place for Asher, I can take on the character of Christ (meekness and humility) and wonder just why I think my son deserves more than God Himself.

The next time we are heavy laden, let us go (at once!) to Jesus.  He will fill us with rest, but let us also linger and ask to take on the character of Christ so we can view things from His perspective, where rest always abounds.

A Withdrawal from the Common

I feel like in order to possess whatever God wants me to possess this year, there is something that has to take place first:  dispossess.  Sometimes you have to clear out the old in order to make room for the new.  Many of you are doing this around your homes.  You may be clearing out some old clothing or home decorations in order to make room for a few new things. 

Perhaps the same can be true spiritually.  In order to possess faith, it seems that fear would have to be let go of.  In order to possess joy, it seems that defeat and discouragement might need the boot.

I've kind of been tossing around the idea of what I might need to let go of in order to obtain whatever God has for me.

I ended up having some church in my little Jesus chair this morning.  Right at home.  The best kind of church!

Hebrews 10:10 says "And by that will we have been sanctified through the offering of the body of Jesus Christ once for all."  Looking up "Sanctified" in Greek, I was a little surprised.  It is the word "Hagiazo" and means what we might think...hallowed or sanctified.  But, it was the explanation that I found so interesting.

The word "hagiazo" (to sanctify) cannot be accomplished without someone separating himself or withdrawing from fellowship with the world.  Hagiazo means to withdraw from fellowship with the world and from selfishness by first gaining fellowship with God and toward God.

Now, I believe that we have a progressive sanctification going on at all times in our Christian walk if we are abiding in Christ.  Was Christ's sacrifice complete at the cross?  Yes, but verse 14 says that "For by a single offering he has perfected for all time those who are being sanctified."  Did you catch that present ongoing verb, "who are being...?"  It is the Greek present participle and it allows for something that is progressive and ongoing.  Yes, Christ's sacrifice was sufficient and complete...that is why He can sit down beside the Father.  And yes, Christ's character is being worked out in us after salvation. Somehow, it is both.

Here is the part I found interesting:  the word "hagiazo" stands in CONTRAST with the Greek word "koinos".  Koinos means defiled, common, unclean...it can mean "common or belonging to several or of which several are partakers." 

Sometimes, the process of sanctification in our lives means we have to be set free from what is common.  You know, what everyone else is doing.  Being sanctified means withdrawing from fellowship with the world.

I know in my own life, this could look a trillion different ways.  How is it that I look just like the common...what do I do that everyone else seems to do as well?  Is it a form of social media like Facebook or Pinterest or blogging?  Is it how I spend money?  Is it how I parent?  Is it the desire to entertain oneself instead of sacrificing oneself?  Is it how I spend my time?

Jesus fully earned my redemption and perfection the moment he laid down his life for me.  Will I surrender/consecrate myself and agree to allow Him to continue to make me look like Himself?

The question I need to ask if I can muster the courage is this:  "What am I fellowshipping with or associated with that is common or defiled that I need to separate from in order to possess what God longs to give to me?"

Once again, I could use a dose of courage.  Becoming more and more like Christ is not for the faint of heart.

Needing Something Powerful?

Call me old, but they wouldn't let me in the doors of the Passion Conference even if I wore my best flannel shirt and skinny jeans.  Apparently, there is an age cut off and I don't quite make it.  But, good news for me, they have been posting livestream videos of the conference...where I can catch up with goodies like Francis Chan, Beth Moore, and John Piper. 

I just can't stop thinking about John Piper's message.  I haven't heard him speak often (just read a ton of his sermons)...but boy, howdy, that man is anointed.  It was the most powerful, beautiful, joyful sermon I have heard in a long time.  And go figure, it has to do with suffering. 

Piper is like that...takes the truth of God's word and makes it so appealing that you want to weep in gratitude for days on end.

We are both in luck...they are leaving the sessions up for today only...I highly recommend session 7 where John Piper speaks.  {You know, if you need something powerful to kick start your year.}

Here is the link to the site...click on session 7...you can also fast forward to where he starts speaking...but I don't recommend it cause you will miss Kari Jobe's most powerful rendition of "Revelation Song" yet!

http://live.268generation.com/session/session-seven

Be blessed...and remember, they are saying the link is only good for today!

2013: {Possess}

I am standing at the threshold of the unknown.  2013 will bring exactly what God has ordained and called good.  I just have to remember that His definition of good doesn't always match up with my own.  Nevertheless, He has gone before me and stands guard behind me.  I am hemmed in by grace this year...no matter what this year may bring.

I sense a lot of change coming with this new year.  Some of it is obvious...a new baby, a teenager, a move.  But there is a whole lot of change I sense that I am not sure of yet. 

While praying over this year and wondering what direction God would have it take, I was also reading Deuteronomy chapter 30.  One word kept jumping off the page throughout the chapter:  POSSESS.  This word occurs three times more in the book of Deuteronomy than any other book of the bible. 

"And the LORD thy God will bring thee into the land which thy fathers possessed and thou shalt possess it; and he will do thee good and multiply thee..."

"...and the LORD thy God shall bless thee in the land whither thou goest to possess it."

This word scares me a little because it is a verb.  The act of possessing something requires action.  The Hebrew word for possess is "yaresh" and means to occupy (especially by driving out previous tenants), to seize, or to inherit.  In a legal sense, it means to become an heir.  In a military sense, it means to invade for the purpose of settling in the territory.  Both meanings are dominant with regard to God's covenant with Israel.

The word possess occurs over and over again in Deuteronomy because the Israelites had to be reminded of their legacy after 40 years of wandering in the wilderness. 

I wonder if there is something out there for our family to take hold of...is there a spiritual legacy that we need to be reminded of and seize with all our mights??

I feel like Judges 18:9-10 is some sort of commission for us...

"And they said, arise, that we may go up against them, for we have seen the land, and behold, it is very good, and are ye still?  Be not slothful to go and to enter to possess the land.  When ye go, ye shall come unto a people secure, and to a large land:  for God hath given it into your hands; a place where there is no want of anything that is in the earth."

I don't know what 2013 holds, but I know that change is coming.  I feel like my word for the year is possess because as children of God, we are to march forward and take whatever He is giving to us (instead of cowering in fear or being lazy or apathetic.) 

I feel like it will be a challenge, but if I can look back at the end of 2013 and see that we were able to seize our inheritance and leave behind a legacy, then God will be glorified.

Here is to the word possess.  This heart could use a little courage.

Remembering 2012: My Scattering of Stones

Many times this year I have wanted to shut down the ol' blog.  It takes a lot of time to maintain and quite frankly, time gets more and more scarce.  But, as I was reviewing some posts from the past year, I realized that this simple blog is how God reminds me of what He has done in my life.  My brain cells seem to be deteriorating and my memory isn't what it used to be.  For me to look back and remember God's faithfulness is healthy for this soul of mine.

In a way, this blog is my altar of remembrance.  In Genesis, those who were seeking after God might lay down stones in a certain area to remember how God had revealed Himself at that place and time.  Some of my posts are simply stones and when I walk by them again, I am reminded of Who He is.

I write so I can remember.

The soul always needs to be reminded lest it get stale.

So, with that, I thought I would leave you my scattering of stones...ways God has revealed Himself to me this year or ways I have found Him faithful. 

1.  Coming Home {Mercy lets the boy-man come home}

2.  Death Precedes Growth {Emptiness is OK in God's eyes}

3.  Cherish the Fetus {Seeing God's glory in a fresh way}

4.  His Display of Affection {God often reveals Himself to me in themes}

5.  The Accuser {How to recognize the true enemy}

6.  The Steer and the Transition {Being Set Free to Make Decisions}

7.  Cycles {How to react when God is silent}

8.  At the King's Gate {Being content with where God has you}

9.  He Goes Before and He Stays Behind {God has us hemmed in}

10.  The Double Camp {The God of Jacob is also my God}

11.  Two Cans of Vienna Sausages {Why it is important to stop for just one}

12.  The Banqueting Table {Ungratefulness keeps us blinded from what God has provided}

13.  Digging Ditches {Perhaps my favorite passage of the Word this year...I don't have to produce rain!}

14.  A Face and a Name {God's mercy and fulfillment in being my Master Gardener...He is about grace and restoration if we simply have eyes to see.}

I reread the above posts and marveled at who our God is...I hope you will be encouraged like I have been!

2012: The Year of Fruit

For a few years now, I have asked the Lord for a word or verse to carry me through the upcoming year....it is a way that I know He will reveal Himself no matter what is thrown my way.

During Thanksgiving of 2011, I heard the Holy Spirit whisper "Fruit" and I knew that was to be my word for the upcoming 2012.  We quickly found out we were pregnant.  I figured the theme of fruit would fit well into having a new baby that year.  When we lost the baby, I wondered why on earth fruit had been whispered at all.

God has been good this year to show me how 2012 has been the year of fruit.  As he slowly healed me from the miscarriage, he allowed me to stumble upon a sermon by Spurgeon called "Supposing Him to be the Gardener."  In the sermon, God showed me that He alone is the one who plants things.  He determines what they are to be and where they are to be planted.  He even has the right to uproot things, in order to create a more beautiful landscape. 

To break it down quickly here is how fruit was produced this year: God healed me, allowed me to know Him as Master Gardener, called Sam to salvation, called me to lead a bible study, brought new couples to our community group, brought an unexpected tax return, gave me a blessed amount of photography clients, allowed me to see Him in fresh ways, and planted Asher Tate right into my womb.  Eric saw fruit in his own life that included freedom and clarity in many situations.

At the beginning of the year, I researched every verse I could find that covered the concept of fruit.  God was clear then...if there was to be any fruit in our lives it would come straight from Him.  Our only role would be to abide.  He would do the rest because He wanted the glory.

I laugh at 2012 because for the first few months, due to grief, I felt like I was a seed dead in the ground, awaiting some kind of light and life.  I am not sure I had anything to offer.  Instead, I kept seeking God's face and waiting.  Abiding was all I could do.

The last few months of the year were consumed with pregnancy nausea and exhaustion.  If I wasn't hugging the toilet or sucking on lemon drops, then I was asleep, just begging God for this phase to pass.  I am pretty sure I had nothing to offer during these months.  But, I kept abiding and waiting.

I think God wanted to show me personally that producing fruit truly is His work.  He is the Gardener, not us.  He simply needs us to be willing.

How has God revealed Himself during 2012 for you?  I've been praying for a new word over 2013 and I think He is answering!  It always does my heart good to remember how He has been faithful and ever present in our lives.

Blessings!

Christmas and the SNOW!

Here's a picture post for you!  Christmas rounds 1 and 2 and the Winter Wonderland!!!

Round 1:

 Round 2:  {Santa left some mighty big gifts this year!}

SNOW:

Merry Christmas!

Merry CHRISTmas!

May you know Him more deeply and love Him more truly.

He is our only hope...as a baby in a manger and as coming King.

Love,

Eric, Becke', Cade, Eli, Sam, and Asher

 

Every year, I ask Jesus to reveal Himself fresh during the Christmas season.  It isn't that a virgin birth, wise men, and a stable birth get old every year, but sometimes I want to see something new.  This year, the theme was that of waiting.

It is easy to forget (or not fully comprehend) how those before Christ were longing for a Savior.  Since we are on the other side of the Sacrifice and Resurrection, we sometimes refuse to think about what it must have been like for those who were daily begging and praying for the Messiah to step down into their ache and time.

It was the first Advent (coming), that Jesus was born in that small and dirty manger.  He came as one of us, to be among us, to rescue us.  He came humbly and as a suffering servant, ready to take on your sin and mine.

We have a taste of that longing that those before Christ had.  We need it fulfilled in our Savior coming as visible King.  We have these aches and sufferings and we look at the world and know in our hearts that all will be set right once He simply comes during the second Advent (coming.)  Our hearts believe and know He will one day do this, but we live amidst a spiritual battlefield that leaves us bloody and worn. 

We are waiting for a merciful and visible King that somehow embodies complete grace and complete justice all at the same time. Our hearts are practically begging.

Those before the cross were waiting.  Those of us after the cross are still waiting.

I don't know what promises have been made by our involved and relational Redeemer, but hold fast.

The waiting won't be forever.

Merry Christmas...blessings abundant on your family!!!

A Face and a Name

I woke up this morning, the morning of December 19th, remembering last year on this date very vividly.  We were expecting a sweet baby and were counting down the days until Christmas so we could share with the boys about the best gift ever.  But, our sweet baby was swept up into the presence of her creator on December 19th.  We hadn't known about her for long, but we loved her completely.  We grieved for all the days we wouldn't have with her.  We celebrated for all the days we will get with her one day.   We call her a girl simply because in our hearts, we know she is.

 

While taking a shower, I realized once again how precise and compassionate and involved our sweet Jesus is.  He knew the ache in our hearts for the daughter we won't see on this earth.  He stepped down and arranged it so that on this day one year later, we would be seeing the face of another gift, our fourth son, Asher Tate Stuart.

 

I can't tell you how I have wept and rejoiced over God's grace in allowing this to occur exactly one year after such heartache.  This day is bittersweet.  God gives and he takes away.  While on this earth, our lives are an odd yet beautiful dance between grief and joy.  It becomes beautiful when we choose to see God in it all. In an all encompassing swoop, my heart is crying out over what was lost one year ago and rejoicing over what God has created now.  Such a sacred and beautiful dance.  He alone is holy.

 

We can't tell you how excited we are about this little boy's name!  In the past, we have always had a girl name and a boy name ready to go when we found out.  It seemed like such an easy transition, knowing them and naming who they were to be.

This time around was completely different.  We just didn't not have a boy name, we didn't even have boy names we liked!  So, we had to start praying and digging deep and listening to what God might want this child to be named.

After we narrowed it down a little, we starting researching the names and their meanings.  Asher means "blessed or happy."  He is one of Jacob's twelve sons in Genesis, also being one of the twelve tribes of Israel.  There are not a whole lot of passages regarding this son, but we really liked what we could find. Here is just one...

"And of Asher he said, Let Asher be blessed with children; let him be acceptable to his brethren, and let him dip his foot in oil.  Thy shoes shall be iron and brass; and as thy days, so shall thy strength be." Deut. 33:24

You know I had to research that a little further and here is what I came up with:

*"acceptable" in Hebrew is "ratson" which means to be pleased with or delighted.  Asher in the Bible was in perfect unity and harmony with the other tribes.

*the reference to dipping his foot in oil means that the land his tribe dwelled on was very fertile and abundant (he had a literal abundance of oil)

*the reference to shoes of iron and brass means that he is strong and impregnable...as if built of iron and brass...his life is one of security and rest

*he was known for his renowned wisdom

*he was an example of a virtuous man who strived for the general good

After discovering all this, Asher just seemed to fit. 

A middle name was even harder.  We considered a few things and finally settled on Tate.  It means "cheerful."  We are basically naming this boy "Happy Cheerful."  A double portion of joy for sure.  Eli smiled all over himself when we told him that Asher means blessed or happy.  He grinned so big I couldn't find his eyes and then he said, "I am so happy we are naming him happy!"

One year ago presented sorrow.  Today I present you a double portion of joy...Asher Tate.  His name is Asher and we want him to know he carries God's blessing in his very name.

God brings grace and restoration to all things.  Lord, continue to give us eyes to see!

The Dreaming

I have always had vivid dreams while being pregnant.  But this fourth time around is offering something entirely different.

And I don't like it.

Nightmares of sorts.  There is always a theme...something terrible is about to happen to myself or someone I love and then I wake up...practically bolt straight up as much as my belly will allow...thinking it was just as real as anything could be.  Then I spend the next little bit telling myself it was just a dream as I try to fall back asleep.

It is almost comical.  But not really.

One night in dreamland, Eric was forced to get married again due to the culture we lived in.  He didn't want to marry someone else, but he had no choice.  He married a young blond cute lil' thing and we all had to get along.  Riiiight.  I felt like Leah in the Bible.  The ugly and old one...but the one that could give him boys, ha!  I woke up right as they were about to go initiate that dual marriage thing.  eek.  the horror.

Another night, I dreamed I was in Fayetteville with the boys.  We were going down a street I wasn't as familiar with.  The street veered to the left and since there were no guardrails, we veered straight off a cliff of sorts.  I woke up in a panic, mid air and desperate for our lives.

Yet another night, I dreamed Eric and I were walking through this field of tall grass at night in the pitch black. We had a flashlight, but it wasn't on.  I told him to turn it on and as he did, we were only a couple of inches away from a whole host of snakes.  They were biting each other and about to have us for dinner, as well.  Snake dreams and I really don't get along.

Last night I dreamed Eric and I were in some neighborhood we weren't familiar with.  I was in the van while he sat on a park bench nearby.  All the sudden these bears were upon him.  He tried to scale a huge wooden fence, but one pawed him to the ground and started swiping at him.  I was in the backseat of the van and opened the door to try to get them to come towards me.  Oh, they came....but I was a little late in getting the door to shut.  I woke up as the bears were trying to paw at me through the open door.

And those are just a few.  It seems like every night I repeat the same pattern...vivid nightmare and then wake up just before the horrible thing occurs.

Goodness, I am so over this!

Pray over me as I sleep at night, would ya? 

Learning to Read

At the beginning of the school year,  I didn't know if Sam would ever get this reading thing down.  He struggled immensely with long versus short vowels.  It seemed like no matter how many ways we tried to teach him, things just wouldn't click.

Eric worked with him a ton.  I worked with him a ton.  His teacher worked with him a ton.  We prayed a ton.

And, then, one day, things were just easier for him.  It was as if a light bulb came on and things just clicked all the sudden.

He could read!

We took Communion tonight as a family at church, each taking turns reading certain passages of Scripture.  Imagine my delight when Sam volunteered to read the last passage.

"You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly.  But God demonstrates His own love for us in this:  While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."  (Rom. 5:6 & 8.)

Sam read every single word by himself correctly minus the three bigger words.

My eyes swam in tears.

The ability to read is imperative in order for your child to function in this world.

But, hearing your child read the Word of God makes your soul swim in delight.

Thank you for hearing our prayers, Lord.

The Bit of Paradise



It looks like moving is in our near future.  With our new baby coming, we just don't know how to make our home work anymore.  We've been here for almost 10 years.  A whole lot of memories have been made.  One kid has been here 10 of his 12 years, another all of his life minus 5 weeks, and another his entire life.  Depending on the timing, we don't even know if the next child will be brought to this home or another.  Bittersweet for sure.  Doesn't help that I am emotional from pregnancy on top of it all!  Ha!

 

These pictures are a few of the sites that I will sorely miss.  Eric's grandparents owned the home before us and his grandad did an amazing job of making the place a tiny paradise.  It took me years to figure it out, but there is something almost always in bloom around here.  Even in the snow!

 

The beautiful site has been a gift for sure, since I don't have a green thumb.  In fact, I am so bad at landscaping that I am pretty sure my thumbs are colorless!  When something always comes back in full color and bloom, I just thank God cause it is a gift totally undeserved!

 

We'll probably put the sweet home on the market after Christmas.  If you know anyone in need of a centrally located home with a great price and huge backyard, send them our way!

 

I am going to go find some tissues now.  sniff.