Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Exchanging the Crowd for a Circle of Quiet

My mind has been a playground of sorts as of late. A playground that has left me fatigued and spent after the thoughts have run around and around the Spin-A-Bout, afterwards only to fling the rest of me onto the hard concrete wondering which way is up.

My mind is weary from all of the anxiety. In the classic story of Mary and Martha, I am reminded that when Martha didn't choose the one thing that was truly necessary...sitting at the feet of Jesus, then she was left worried and upset. Beth Moore says that "upset" is "turba" in Greek and means "crowded."

That has been my mind. It is crowded. Crowded with many ideas that don't know which way is up. Crowded to the point of exhaustion, anger, and unbelief. Ideas that aren't bad in and of themselves, but have become a root of sin as I have tried to take control and become obsessed with how to proceed with them.

I read a verse that made me thirsty. I want it in my life! Psalm 94:12-13 says "How blessed the man you train, God, the woman you instruct in your Word, providing a circle of quiet within the clamor of evil, while a jail is being built for the wicked."

I want to trade the crowd for a circle of quiet.

I think I know the way back to that. It is like going home.

"Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him..."

"Be still and know that I am God..."

"Know that the LORD is God..."

"Commit your way to the LORD and trust in Him..."

When I was at the zoo and saw the pelican going from a state of work to a state of rest, I was just simply amazed. It wasn't like I had never seen a bird at rest, with their necks doing a 180 as they tuck their beaks into their feathers. I think it caught me off guard because I was standing about 2 feet away from him. He was oblivious to the crowd around him and decided it was time to rest. And, so he did.

Apparently, this method of rest is called the "Wing Tuck" method. The birds rest their heads on their backs while they nuzzle their beaks into their back feathers (which acts as a pillow) and allows them to rest their neck muscles and tends to help them conserve heat.

It reminds me of the verse that says "under his wings you will find refuge."

It struck me as hilarious that when my "beak" or mouth is hidden beneath His feathers, I can no longer spout off words of insecurity, confusion, anxiety and unbelief. My desire for control has basically been muzzled.

I so long for a circle of quiet to replace the crowd. I lay every single burden at the foot of your cross and choose to rest.

1 comment:

Nic said...

Oh Dear I feel the same way! I'm feeling very lost at the moment. I just havent been able to get back to where I was.